I don’t think I’ve ever been brave, 
it’s always been a strange concept to me.
Sterling screens swell my heart with dreams
but when the lights go on, and the eyes go down, I see
every decision I’ve made has been
a step backwards
into shade.

And it’s from the shadows I see 
brave ones marching through the streets
crashing shining diamond boats floating in tow
note the livery of open hearts on shoulders shaking
beneath the falling snow, paper, paper snow.

I still love them
even if it is a strange concept to me,
even if it’s just a step backwards
into nothing.

Gasping epilogue
twelve years later, waking up
hear people, and smell places,
tear them to pieces when saying their names
this is how I’m brave,
too much,
too late.